Something that makes me proud is that I know my truth. Even when it's felt out of reach, I've always found my way back to the core of who I am, especially when it comes to adversity. That, to me, is a sign of emotional maturity. There was a time in my journey when I took everything personally, from people's bad moods to projections that had nothing to do with me. I knew I was growing and healing when I stopped making other people's pain about me.
A mantra I often say to myself in contentious moments that I know are not about me or my actions is this: The healed version of me recognizes and honors the unhealed version of you.
These words keep me rooted in empathy and compassion. It helps me depersonalize and stay grounded in truth.
Not taking things to heart, and making them true in our lives, is a challenging practice. It invites us to look at the people lashing out, for whatever reason, and see their aggression through a lens of compassion, empathy, and softness. Now, I know empathy is not always the first place we tend to go when someone talks to us sideways, is mean, or treats us indifferently. But over the years, after exercising my compassion muscle, it's maybe the second place I go in my head versus the last place, which is progress.
As I continue to grow, I realize that by prioritizing what I know to be true in my life and looking at the micro changes in my healing, I lean deeper into gratitude practice and inner peace. It feels less like a struggle to remember who I am in times of adversity. Something I continue to learn on this path is that everything isn't always about me—even when people treat me poorly.Â
The reframe I'm grateful for is this:Â Maybe they're going through something. I know who I am. Their aggression is not about me.
The Lesson:Â Don't let other people's bad behavior throw you off or take you backward.
Community Questions (leave a comment):
What has staying true to yourself taught you about gratitude?
What emotional baggage that does not belong to you do you need to put down?
What do you know to be true about your life and how far you've come?
What has staying true to yourself taught you about gratitude? It's the little things that bring me the most joy. I say "thank you" to green lights. LOL.
What emotional baggage that does not belong to you do you need to put down? Taking on other people's pain as if it's something I need to fix. Not my circus...
What do you know to be true about your life and how far you've come? I have separated from the abuse I endured (verbal, emotional) and I cherish that little girl's strength and resilience, but I no longer need to protect her. She's fine. She has a voice. No need to shout on her behalf anymore.
Thank you for this beautiful post, Alex. xo
This is exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you!