What a gift to have found a matching reflection of each other’s soul. And that you’ve sparked growth together and allowed love to let you both shine so beautifully... Lovely and wise words!
wow, congratulations on 7 years of marriage! it was beautiful reading each of your separate reflections throughout your years of commitment to each other. i am currently in a relationship, and both my partner and i experience disagreements that we both don’t clearly know how to express to each other. when these disagreements happen my mind always goes to ending the relationship instead of talking through it. for some reason i always jump to the conclusion that he won’t understand and we’re clearly not aligned when in reality he may not understand but he also cannot read my mind. i have to pause and remember that if i don’t express how i feel i am not even giving him the opportunity to try to understand. thankfully neither of us have given up on each other yet and each time we have a rift it brings us closer to each other. thank you for sharing this with us. each 7 reflections are helpful tools that i can apply to my relationship to grow in a healthier way.
I was just talking about this with a friend who just met a great fit. I told him, let it ride for a few months and if it’s still good, get married and start a family (they are in the mid 30’s and 40’s and want kids).
After that call I checked in with an older colleague (with three grown kids) and he thought my gut feeling was sound. He said his opinion commitment and letting the partnership shape you is a key to a lasting relationship.
I guess as I get older i become even less romantic....marriage as an institution is a helluva a lot better than the arranged marriages of our great and grandparents, but I suspect it is much more about the commitment to family as a unit than our current society’s obsession with the flutter butterflies of young puppy love (I suspect that is a curse of being an actor, constantly having to act that moment out on the big screen)
This post is absolutely delicious! Thank you for nourishing me with your words. And thank you for nourishing yourselves and each other. That you do so is clear in your ability to offer readers such depth.
We celebrated 29 years married yesterday, June 4th. We’ve raised three black, boys to men, in a primarily white community. Two of our sons have special needs and different abilities. Holding a marriage together under such stressful circumstances, has been work! We needed each other to survive. We were a refuge to one another during the most difficult times.
Love, ebbs, flows, evolves, and changes over time as we grow, mature, and do our personal healing work. My therapist says I have earned a “personal degree in me.”
I am praying that he does HIS work so that we make it through our 30th year.
Congratulations to you and Ryan on your 7th anniversary. It looks like you both struck gold.
Such a beautiful piece. I love that you have different lists (I was expecting a collaboration!) which says something to me about the importance of being ourselves and bringing ourselves to the relationship and not just merging into each other... I have so much in common with my lovely spouse that sometimes I have to remember to also pursue my own curiosities. I identify with pretty much all you've written, it's not always easy but how rewarding... What a gorgeous family you have ❤️
Thank you for sharing. This was right on time to keep in mind as my partner and I enter year six together. Thank you both for sharing. Very beautiful and very real words.
This is such a sweet post. Life partner writers, be still my heart! Also happy anniversary. Seven years in myself and it takes a lot more than love to make it work. I'd add in therapy too. For ourselves individually and as a couple too. At least for myself, it's been a game changer.
I don’t know your other half but I love what I have seen though your eyes. You see I have a very mother hen trait and I’m always prepared to support/defend those I love. Yes ma’am, you Alex are loved. I wish you and Ryan could see the beam that creeped across my face as I read his points. I’ll admit I skipped yours in search of his words. All I can say is BRAVO!
Several gifts in this post. Saving to re-read... thank you thank you, Alex and family.
Thank you for sharing, I am hopeful for the opportunity to love again and continue to my work of self-healing. 🫶🏽
What a gift to have found a matching reflection of each other’s soul. And that you’ve sparked growth together and allowed love to let you both shine so beautifully... Lovely and wise words!
wow, congratulations on 7 years of marriage! it was beautiful reading each of your separate reflections throughout your years of commitment to each other. i am currently in a relationship, and both my partner and i experience disagreements that we both don’t clearly know how to express to each other. when these disagreements happen my mind always goes to ending the relationship instead of talking through it. for some reason i always jump to the conclusion that he won’t understand and we’re clearly not aligned when in reality he may not understand but he also cannot read my mind. i have to pause and remember that if i don’t express how i feel i am not even giving him the opportunity to try to understand. thankfully neither of us have given up on each other yet and each time we have a rift it brings us closer to each other. thank you for sharing this with us. each 7 reflections are helpful tools that i can apply to my relationship to grow in a healthier way.
Congrats and great post!!
I was just talking about this with a friend who just met a great fit. I told him, let it ride for a few months and if it’s still good, get married and start a family (they are in the mid 30’s and 40’s and want kids).
After that call I checked in with an older colleague (with three grown kids) and he thought my gut feeling was sound. He said his opinion commitment and letting the partnership shape you is a key to a lasting relationship.
I guess as I get older i become even less romantic....marriage as an institution is a helluva a lot better than the arranged marriages of our great and grandparents, but I suspect it is much more about the commitment to family as a unit than our current society’s obsession with the flutter butterflies of young puppy love (I suspect that is a curse of being an actor, constantly having to act that moment out on the big screen)
This post is absolutely delicious! Thank you for nourishing me with your words. And thank you for nourishing yourselves and each other. That you do so is clear in your ability to offer readers such depth.
We celebrated 29 years married yesterday, June 4th. We’ve raised three black, boys to men, in a primarily white community. Two of our sons have special needs and different abilities. Holding a marriage together under such stressful circumstances, has been work! We needed each other to survive. We were a refuge to one another during the most difficult times.
Love, ebbs, flows, evolves, and changes over time as we grow, mature, and do our personal healing work. My therapist says I have earned a “personal degree in me.”
I am praying that he does HIS work so that we make it through our 30th year.
Congratulations to you and Ryan on your 7th anniversary. It looks like you both struck gold.
Such a beautiful piece. I love that you have different lists (I was expecting a collaboration!) which says something to me about the importance of being ourselves and bringing ourselves to the relationship and not just merging into each other... I have so much in common with my lovely spouse that sometimes I have to remember to also pursue my own curiosities. I identify with pretty much all you've written, it's not always easy but how rewarding... What a gorgeous family you have ❤️
Thank you for sharing. This was right on time to keep in mind as my partner and I enter year six together. Thank you both for sharing. Very beautiful and very real words.
excellent lists. These are keepers for when we do marriage counseling.
This is such a sweet post. Life partner writers, be still my heart! Also happy anniversary. Seven years in myself and it takes a lot more than love to make it work. I'd add in therapy too. For ourselves individually and as a couple too. At least for myself, it's been a game changer.
Great post! Thanks for the tips!
Is there a way to have your list in a PDF or something? Not to copy but recreate our own. Love this
I don’t know your other half but I love what I have seen though your eyes. You see I have a very mother hen trait and I’m always prepared to support/defend those I love. Yes ma’am, you Alex are loved. I wish you and Ryan could see the beam that creeped across my face as I read his points. I’ll admit I skipped yours in search of his words. All I can say is BRAVO!
Happy 7, beautiful wisdom here ❤️
This was so helpful. Love is more than just a feeling in marriage!