This is so timely and so needed Alex. I think as women and mothers we find it hard to celebrate ourselves as we often times see our accomplishments as mere living life. I don’t think I’ve celebrated many achievements in life and I too question why it’s soo hard.. even my birthday is a challenge but the fact that we can acknowledge it’s a problem is a large leap in the right direction. I’m celebrating being able to acknowledge my shortcomings big and small. Long may it continue 🙏
Thank you for this Gratitude Journal, and congratulations on your wonderful accomplishment!
I am celebrating myself for being a good caregiver for my son, every day, all day, doing the work, and also finding the joy.
Self-celebration is challenging because my work is what I “should” be doing, without need for any pat on the back.
This past week, a sign went up on the highway I drive to take my son to his day program for developmentally disabled adults. It was intended for the racers in the upcoming Ironman Arizona, and said something like, “Your hard work is an inspiration – keep it up!” I first saw it on a diffcult, stressful morning, and I felt it was speaking directly to me. I sat up a little straighter. All week, I passed that sign, and felt stronger. I know that sign will come down when the race is done, but I am grateful for that reminder to appreciate myself for my own hard work.
Congratulations on achieving New York Times Best Sellers List, that's huge!
I too find it hard to celebrate myself - I think it's partly because I feel like I'm so far from where I want to be and I have a huge potential, and until I get there, I can't fully celebrate myself.
Lots of us have grown up with the narrative of being humble. This was coming from folks who could not love and approve of themselves. It is our time to know that celebration whether small or huge are signs of loving ourselves. Congratulations Alex!👍🏾👏🏾🎉
I am celebrating myself for approaching another year of life and staying committed to my healing journey. It hasn’t been easy, but the process has shown me so much about my trauma and how it has impacted my life into adulthood.
Self celebration is hard for me because I’ve never been celebrated as a child. Birthdays were pretty much just regular days. I’ve graduated high school and college and I was never celebrated.... it was treated like any other day, so I began to stop expecting anything in order to minimize my disappointment. Self celebration is hard because my inner child doesn’t know what calls for celebration.
Gratitude still finds me because I know that unpacking these feelings is something that takes time and patience, and I have an abundance of the two for myself. I find peace knowing that even though I’m barely 25, the healing work that I’m doing now will benefit my lineage to come. Gratitude finds me when I remember that I get to be the parent to myself that I needed as a child. I don’t have to wait for others to tell me what is worthy of celebration. I can show up for myself celebrate both the big and small accomplishments.
1. I am celebrating myself for not giving up on my dreams. I’m working hard so one day I can help support my mom, and she doesn’t have to work anymore. I think I’ve found something that I will love to do and I’m going for it.
I am celebrating myself for giving myself permission to be inconsistent.
why isn’t self-celebration challenging for you? Because, I recognize that if I constantly delay self-celebration, I will always be waiting for the next milestone and I’ll never fully appreciate the present. I’ll always be living for what’s next.
Where has gratitude shown up, even in doubt? In my partnership. Recognizing how my partner holds space for me to be myself fully. I am grateful for that safe emotional space especially as I navigate my next steps professionally.
As always, thank you! This is confirmation for me that I am feeling what I am feeling and on the right path. I too forget to "big myself up!" and take a look back at all that I have accomplished. I resigned as an NYC educator this summer after 18 years. This has been a challenge and I gain inspiration from you and I would like to write about it. It's been one incredible year! So many SELF discoveries. Like you, I have struggled with self-celebration but can easily give it to others. I have been delving and doing shadow work to find the root of this blockage. I'm getting closer. For starters I am allowing people to treat me to things. I want to say " no no no" but I realize my non acceptance of their gift is why I struggle in more areas than one and too much to write lol (plus you are busy being a leader and best selling author to read all of that lol). I appreciate your emails and the opportunity to get this off my chest even if you don't read it or reply. I appreciate it. Have a great day and week!
This is so relatable on many levels. It's sad how we can be in a room full of supportive loved ones, only to listen to the one person who doubts us.
Self-celebration is something I struggle with as well, mostly because I know what I build for myself could be taken away at any moment. It's almost like if I don't celebrate *too* much, it won't hurt as much if it's gone one day. It's still a work in progress for embracing my accomplishments but I'll get there!
Don't know you or your work very well, so maybe take this with a grain of salt, as they say...
Maybe you have an idea of how you think you should fee (in reaction to this award). This award is an externality which is not the true "why" of your work. You do what you do for the daily moments, not the big award(s). Those of us who believe we are doing things in order to achieve the big (external) award(s), maybe find a confliction arise when it is achieved - realizing more tangibly that it was always, and still is, in the daily process that the real reward lies. [You know, the journey is the destination type stuff - nothing novel, nothing you don't already know]
To me, you expressing that maybe you're not fully celebrating yourself, and that this is an example of how you're not, might be a little perpendicular. Maybe you're just aware that this award is one deemed by others. Maybe intuitively your relationship with what another deems of you/your work is one of unattachment. What you deem of you/your work is what you are more interested/invested in (if I had to guess).
Really, you are free to take this award however you'd like, whenever you'd like. If you decide 10 more years from now that you'd like to celebrate yourself for this very award, the same freedom then will still be yours to exercise. There is no rush. And there is no wrong.
Congratulations on making it to this moment, swimmingly. I personally look forward to making your work a part of my life soon!
I am celebrating myself for being here, and continuing to do my inner work, especially during seasons when I feel like I'm drowning and just want to give up.
I find it challenging to celebrate myself because I was never taught how, I was told to humble myself, I compare my achievements to others' and belittle them, I'm afraid to step fully into my power, I'm afraid of being seen, and more. Even when I recognize I have done something I'm proud of - no matter how small or big - I don't feel it in my body so I haven't yet embodied the experience of truly celebrating myself. Like everything else on this healing journey, it will take practice. 🙏🏾
It has been challenging to turn and look at what has gone right in the last 1 1/2 years.
What hasn't worked out is louder in my head. I live in a new State, in a new life; one I wasn't expecting. I have done everything I can to stay sane during this transition to adapting this new world. I have sought out mental health professionals and changing my nutrition to help my mood, etc.
I am celebrating myself for continuing to show up, even when I was broken, a mess, unraveled or ridden with fear and anxiety. It may not have been my all in those moments but I chose to stay in this human experiance when I wanted to give up many times and for that I am celebrating.
This article is really moving and inspiring. Self-celebration is really hard but I find this because im still young and I have nothing much to celebrate.
This is so timely and so needed Alex. I think as women and mothers we find it hard to celebrate ourselves as we often times see our accomplishments as mere living life. I don’t think I’ve celebrated many achievements in life and I too question why it’s soo hard.. even my birthday is a challenge but the fact that we can acknowledge it’s a problem is a large leap in the right direction. I’m celebrating being able to acknowledge my shortcomings big and small. Long may it continue 🙏
Thank you for this Gratitude Journal, and congratulations on your wonderful accomplishment!
I am celebrating myself for being a good caregiver for my son, every day, all day, doing the work, and also finding the joy.
Self-celebration is challenging because my work is what I “should” be doing, without need for any pat on the back.
This past week, a sign went up on the highway I drive to take my son to his day program for developmentally disabled adults. It was intended for the racers in the upcoming Ironman Arizona, and said something like, “Your hard work is an inspiration – keep it up!” I first saw it on a diffcult, stressful morning, and I felt it was speaking directly to me. I sat up a little straighter. All week, I passed that sign, and felt stronger. I know that sign will come down when the race is done, but I am grateful for that reminder to appreciate myself for my own hard work.
Congratulations on achieving New York Times Best Sellers List, that's huge!
I too find it hard to celebrate myself - I think it's partly because I feel like I'm so far from where I want to be and I have a huge potential, and until I get there, I can't fully celebrate myself.
I think self celebration is challenging because it wasn’t modeled for me. The extent of it was someone’s birthday or if you got a new job.
I have a question Alex (if you don’t mind sharing) how did you choose to celebrate making NY Time best sellers list? 🙂
Lots of us have grown up with the narrative of being humble. This was coming from folks who could not love and approve of themselves. It is our time to know that celebration whether small or huge are signs of loving ourselves. Congratulations Alex!👍🏾👏🏾🎉
I am celebrating myself for approaching another year of life and staying committed to my healing journey. It hasn’t been easy, but the process has shown me so much about my trauma and how it has impacted my life into adulthood.
Self celebration is hard for me because I’ve never been celebrated as a child. Birthdays were pretty much just regular days. I’ve graduated high school and college and I was never celebrated.... it was treated like any other day, so I began to stop expecting anything in order to minimize my disappointment. Self celebration is hard because my inner child doesn’t know what calls for celebration.
Gratitude still finds me because I know that unpacking these feelings is something that takes time and patience, and I have an abundance of the two for myself. I find peace knowing that even though I’m barely 25, the healing work that I’m doing now will benefit my lineage to come. Gratitude finds me when I remember that I get to be the parent to myself that I needed as a child. I don’t have to wait for others to tell me what is worthy of celebration. I can show up for myself celebrate both the big and small accomplishments.
1. I am celebrating myself for not giving up on my dreams. I’m working hard so one day I can help support my mom, and she doesn’t have to work anymore. I think I’ve found something that I will love to do and I’m going for it.
I am celebrating myself for giving myself permission to be inconsistent.
why isn’t self-celebration challenging for you? Because, I recognize that if I constantly delay self-celebration, I will always be waiting for the next milestone and I’ll never fully appreciate the present. I’ll always be living for what’s next.
Where has gratitude shown up, even in doubt? In my partnership. Recognizing how my partner holds space for me to be myself fully. I am grateful for that safe emotional space especially as I navigate my next steps professionally.
As always, thank you! This is confirmation for me that I am feeling what I am feeling and on the right path. I too forget to "big myself up!" and take a look back at all that I have accomplished. I resigned as an NYC educator this summer after 18 years. This has been a challenge and I gain inspiration from you and I would like to write about it. It's been one incredible year! So many SELF discoveries. Like you, I have struggled with self-celebration but can easily give it to others. I have been delving and doing shadow work to find the root of this blockage. I'm getting closer. For starters I am allowing people to treat me to things. I want to say " no no no" but I realize my non acceptance of their gift is why I struggle in more areas than one and too much to write lol (plus you are busy being a leader and best selling author to read all of that lol). I appreciate your emails and the opportunity to get this off my chest even if you don't read it or reply. I appreciate it. Have a great day and week!
This is so relatable on many levels. It's sad how we can be in a room full of supportive loved ones, only to listen to the one person who doubts us.
Self-celebration is something I struggle with as well, mostly because I know what I build for myself could be taken away at any moment. It's almost like if I don't celebrate *too* much, it won't hurt as much if it's gone one day. It's still a work in progress for embracing my accomplishments but I'll get there!
Alex,
Don't know you or your work very well, so maybe take this with a grain of salt, as they say...
Maybe you have an idea of how you think you should fee (in reaction to this award). This award is an externality which is not the true "why" of your work. You do what you do for the daily moments, not the big award(s). Those of us who believe we are doing things in order to achieve the big (external) award(s), maybe find a confliction arise when it is achieved - realizing more tangibly that it was always, and still is, in the daily process that the real reward lies. [You know, the journey is the destination type stuff - nothing novel, nothing you don't already know]
To me, you expressing that maybe you're not fully celebrating yourself, and that this is an example of how you're not, might be a little perpendicular. Maybe you're just aware that this award is one deemed by others. Maybe intuitively your relationship with what another deems of you/your work is one of unattachment. What you deem of you/your work is what you are more interested/invested in (if I had to guess).
Really, you are free to take this award however you'd like, whenever you'd like. If you decide 10 more years from now that you'd like to celebrate yourself for this very award, the same freedom then will still be yours to exercise. There is no rush. And there is no wrong.
Congratulations on making it to this moment, swimmingly. I personally look forward to making your work a part of my life soon!
Sincerely,
A Stranger
I am celebrating myself for being here, and continuing to do my inner work, especially during seasons when I feel like I'm drowning and just want to give up.
I find it challenging to celebrate myself because I was never taught how, I was told to humble myself, I compare my achievements to others' and belittle them, I'm afraid to step fully into my power, I'm afraid of being seen, and more. Even when I recognize I have done something I'm proud of - no matter how small or big - I don't feel it in my body so I haven't yet embodied the experience of truly celebrating myself. Like everything else on this healing journey, it will take practice. 🙏🏾
It has been challenging to turn and look at what has gone right in the last 1 1/2 years.
What hasn't worked out is louder in my head. I live in a new State, in a new life; one I wasn't expecting. I have done everything I can to stay sane during this transition to adapting this new world. I have sought out mental health professionals and changing my nutrition to help my mood, etc.
I am celebrating myself for continuing to show up, even when I was broken, a mess, unraveled or ridden with fear and anxiety. It may not have been my all in those moments but I chose to stay in this human experiance when I wanted to give up many times and for that I am celebrating.
This hit hard for me. Thank you for sharing!
This article is really moving and inspiring. Self-celebration is really hard but I find this because im still young and I have nothing much to celebrate.